Hi, so... I felt the need to talk to someone today, sadly, I don't really feel that there is anyone in my life that I can truly talk to. I mean I have friends and family, and even coworkers who'll listen. But they'll also judge or weigh-in or try to fix or just not understand. I don't know maybe I'm not giving them a fair shake, but it's how I feel. I feel like with them certain topics are off limits; that even bringing the topics up would be a relationship ender.
So what do I do? I joke. I kid. I swallow the topics I want to talk about. I stay in the safe zone.
Sure, I'll bring up oddities or strange things. But those are safe.
So I talk to myself. And I answer. I read somewhere that psychologists say this is a sign of feeling that you don't feel you are being heard and that the only opinion you can truly rely on or trust is yours as others let you down. Or you fear to be let down.
I guess my desire is for someone with whom no topic is off the table, that I feel safe and comfortable enough with to talk about anything and everything. While this doesn't preclude prayer, prayer is not as immediate and physically satisfying as a person to person conversation.
Well, thanks for letting me vent.
